Friday, November 3, 2017

JK1M result

I promised I'd update weekly but it seems like laziness has conquered me. About the JK1M, I've lost about 10kgs and counting although these few days my meals weren't that wholesome. My mom and I actually ended up having so much fun and I could see her health condition improves. As for me, most of my shirts and pants starting to felt loose.

This week started up extra stressful for us family since my brother is going to have an operation on his back bone. The bad cells have spread and nest there until his left hand is affected; it's weak and he can't really feel or move his fingers anymore.

This year have basically been a long nightmare to us and if the nightmare have a climax, this is it. Mom super stressed and emotional, I actually witness my dad shed a couple tears in account of his concern about the operation.

Alhamdulillah the operation runs smoothly and Nazrin is recovering rapidly more than I though he will, which is actually a huge relief. Just a quick update, hope to write here soon.

Allons-y!

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

JK1M9 2: Hate You Coach!

Antara benda yang akan terkeluar dari mulut kau kalau first time workout. Aku tak hate pon coachnye tau!

Meeting kedua kiteorang buat circuit training, basically a bunch of workout regime [squat, lunge, mountain climber, pushup dll]  ada set2 dia. Coach kata harini tak penat sangat tapi masa buat tu ya ampun nak pensan pon ada. Rasanya adat lah tu sebab first time buat semua ni.

Tapi betul la, kalau ramai2 buat memang lagi semangat berbanding buat sorang2. Banyak benda jugak aku belajar tapi rasanya ada salah buat ni sebab sakit pinggang 😭. Tak tahu ah esok macam mana, hopefully makin ok lah, kalau boleh taknak lah skip kelas rugi je rasa.

Lepas cool down semalam ada sharing success story dari salah sorang peserta, dia sebelum ni 150kg tapi dengan usaha yang sangat gigih sekarang dah around 80kg lebih macam tu. Lagi sorang umur dah 51 tapi masih aktif lagi membuktikan bahawasanya kalau nak, ada cara. Jangan jadikan umur atau jantina dan sebagainya sebagai alasan.

Tak sabar pulak nak next class walaupun rasa sakit tu ada semangat pun ada sekali, wahai pinggang esok jangan sakit lagi eh...

Aja aja fighting!

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

JK1M9: 1 Baby Shark

Hari khamis Coach buat whatsapp group untuk anak2 buah dia, untuk pengumuman serta nak monitor pemakanan kita. First meeting untuk group kiteorang hari Sabtu 9.9.2017 kat seksyen 8.

Walaupun excited, aku dengan mak punya semangat dah kurang 50% sebab baru dapat berita pasal abang. Aku cerita kat post lain lah nanti eh.

Basically first meeting ni, coach nak terangkan pasal pemakanan yang sihat apa yang bagus apa yang tak semua. Bincang pasal schedule dengan venues. Exercise pon ada tapi sikit2 jelah.

Oh, ada sesi timbang-menimbang jugak! Haa agak seram lah ya tapi ni untuk banding keberkesanan program ni. Coach pon tak buat muka judging pon kalau berat kau berkoyan-koyan [macam akula], kebanyakan coach adalah professional gym instructor, jadia diorang dah biasa dengan benda2 macam ni.

Alhamdulillah dapat coach yang relek2 je tak strict sangat. Pandai melawak jugak. Cuma bab melukis tu hancus sikit. Coach Dollah kalau baca jangan marah ehh.

Ada jugak main game just untuk ceriakan suasana. Game sorok tangan. Game Zombie. Aku pulak kena jadi zombie. Jalan macam tempang, macam zombie dalam Plants vs Zombie tu. Pastu team yang kalah kena menari chicken dance dengan baby shark. Team aku kena menari baby shark. Teringat pulak kat si kecik Maryam ❤️. Mak siap rekod lagi kiteorang menari haha. Jangan harap lah aku nak upload kat sini, segan oi!

Lepas tu boleh terus balik. Coach dia lepaskan kita on time, tu yang best tu. Takdela melarat2 macam typical janji Melayu.

Overall aku rasa bersemangat sikit nak kuruskan badan. Entah percubaan kali ke berapa entah ni. Kali ni kena istiqomah. Sebab dah ada ilmu yang betul insyaallah boleh buat.

Aja aja fighting!!

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

JK1M 2017

Kelmarin mak tiba2 cakap

"Jom along kita join Jom Kurus yang Kevin Zahri tu"

Aku diam. Lama aku fikir. Sebenarnya ada terdetik jugak tapi tak tahulah kenapa aku tak join. Ni dah ada geng aku rasa ok lah. At least ada kawan.

Dah lama aku ada masalah ni. Masalah berat badan. Aku tahu je aku ni "fluffy". Lepas tu pulak baker, jenis yang kalau bake memang berdiri je. Malam sakit tumit. Setiap kali rasa macam tu aku berazam nak kuruskan badan. Tapi azam tu hilang bila nampak makanan best2.

Ya, aku suka makan. Ade ke orang yang tak suka makan? Makan best kot. Lepas tu malas nak exercise. Memangla makin lama mengembang macam belon kena pam. Lepas tu mula la bising sakit kaki.

Program dia start sabtu ni 9.9.2017. 6 minggu. Aku excited dalam masa yang sama takut. Entahlah, mungkin aku ada fear of success? Tapi kaki aku memang betul2 harapkan badan aku ni kurang sikit berat dia, sebab sekarang kalau bangun lepas duduk lama pon kaki sakit. Tapi lama2 ok lah.

Erm kau. Ye kau. Aku tahu *kadang2* kau bukak blog ni. Aku dok terpikir kat ko beberapa hari ni. Kenapa tah. Hope ko ok.

Btw, mungkin aku akan update pasal JK1M ni weekly. Semoga berjaya. Hehe.

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Wonder woman

Most people that are close to me have told me that I'm like a child. I'm not entirely sure that it is childlike [positive]  or childish [negative], but I take it as a good thing.

I always live in my own world and have the crazy idea that things will work out in the end. I like to watch disney movies and some of them I know by heart. When bad things happen I always find a good in them. I like to act goofy and sometimes stupid to make people around me smile. It's as if I'm always floating in this cloud of joy.

But since we get the earth shattering news early this year, I feel like something has pulled my leg to the ground and smack me with reality. Some might call it, growing up?

I always worry. I can't seem to find the light at the end of tunnel. Even though I always put a strong face and try to act goofy especially in tough times, I feel like I'm fooling myself. And you know what I realize?

GROWING up sucks big time.

It's been a while that I release the child in me and I can feel it screaming to get out. I want to release it badly. I just forget how.

Business aren't so good these days. I've even considered finding an office job. There's a war inside me between sticking to this baking thing, finding a job or finally finalize my cafe idea. It's happening every day and I'm tired of it. Might be the reason why I slept a lot these days.

I overcome some of my fear this year. I finally confessed to my hight school crush and able to move on from him. I do some bold promoting. I actually jogged. But you know what, the cafe idea is my biggest fear and my ultimate dream at the same time. People say that if your dreams doesn't scare you, it's not big enough. Yes I'm scared. I found a million excuses to not do this now. But at the same time I ask myself if now now, then, when?

Another thing, the love life thing. I tried. As much as it's hard to find love when your work revolves around your house it's even harder when you're fat. Yes I know I'm fat, I realize it, I'm not delusional. I'm okay with it. The problem is, other people, specifically guys, don't. And I'm not using that as an excuse, but it's definitely a reason.

I'm currently on Gilmore Girls rerun marathon and I come across this scene where Lorelai is upset because she's finally together together with Christopher but his girlfriend Sherry is pregnant thus ending the thing between them. She confessed to Luke

"I feel like I’m never gonna have it. . .the whole package, you know? That person, that couple life, and I swear, I hate admitting it because I fancy myself Wonder Woman, but. . .I really want it – the whole package."

And guess what, that hits me in the feels, every freaking time. And I realize it because I actually feel the same way. And it sucks.

Okay that's all. There's a plate of mi raja with my name on it calling me so I have to go eat my moreh, see yah later!