Broken puzzle

"Need some time to sort and patch and assemble all the pieces of puzzles that are broken and shattered this few years back as well as casting away the reason why."

Just to be clear, "puzzle" is not us. "Puzzle" is just me and me alone.

So, this is it.

Alhamdulillah finally after all the scavenger hunt, I am offered a job at this Japanese company that makes hard disk, Asahi Kosei. I've been back and forth about making the decision to work there since it is located in Balakong which is about one hour drive from my house. I've considered renting a room there but after listening to many many opinions and considering all the risk, I've decided to travel within this early phase. After being familiar with the location and workplace, maybe the renting option will be considered again.

Actually it has been about a month I think since the person told me that I get the job, but after that I never hear from him, might be busy or something, leave me here with all this uncertainties about the position. After calling a couple times finally the human resource department called to ask me when can I start working and whats not.

And today, I received my offer letter through e-mail. People keep saying, no black and white, no deal. And here is it, my black and white. Finally. After receiving this, all of this are becoming real. The job, its real. The degree, its real. The adulthood, the responsibilities, all of them, REAL.

I've been a bit high this week for some reason, and this offer letter pulls my legs back to the ground. Its time to grow up now. Must I, though?

Daylight

Here I am waiting

I'll have to leave soon

Why am I holding on?

We knew this day would come

We knew it all along

How did it come so fast?

About a month ago, when I hear this song on radio, I just admire the perfection in Adam Lavine's voice. But now when I listen closely, it reminds me of something. Him.

Its been a few years now. And in the near future, he'll be back to his hometown. After that, I don't know what will happen. We both didn't.

Its not a break up song. Its about someone who wishes for more time to spend with his lover. He wants to cherish every last moment they have together. He has to leave for some apparent reason. And left his beloved behind.

When people ask, how do you know its love, I don't know how to answer. I just feel it, you know. The exhilaration when that person is around you. How much they cross your mind when they're far. How much you miss them even after 5 minutes you say goodbye to each other. How you wish you can be by their side like, forever.

And the other person, he might not be the perfect guy in the world, but for you, there's no comparison. You can line him with others; your best friend, your friendzoned guy friend, your celebrity crush, still, he's the one you want.

All this mushy gushy love thingy, I didn't made it up. I actually feel it. And I know I'll miss him when he's gone back to his home town.

People always say long distance is risky. For some concrete reason, I believe in that too. I actually witnessed many relationship that didn't survive the test of distance. Not to blame anyone, people need companion. But it left a deep scar to the person involved, especially the one who's being left.

Its not that I didn't trust him. To be honest, I didn't trust myself. I know its not wise to reveal such thing here. But its true. I have my reasons.

We can pray. Put faith in Allah. If its meant to be, it'll be, right? I know we're strong enough for any test. Just have to wait for the right time, and Allah's blessing. Insyaallah. :-)

And when the daylight comes I'll have to go 

But tonight I'm gonna hold you so close 

Cause in the daylight we'll be on our own 

But tonight I need to hold you so close