The spooky building

Just now my mom asked me

"Who is this?"

"I'm Chuck Bass"

and I answered

"He's my new boyfriend" with a mischievous smile.

If only I can date him for real. Last night I dreamt about this bad boy again. Apparently we are exclusive and at the moment, we're just hanging out with out friends. On the way to the hang out place, there's a spooky-looking old building. That building remind me of somewhere but I can't recall where is it or where I saw it from. In the building I saw a hole in the wall, with a glimpse I swear I saw something is moving through the hole. While walking we hear wind swooshing and the shadow in the building is moving but none of us are brave enough to look upwards.

The spooky building kinda looks like this

We hang out in the middle of an old mall, and my boyfriend Chuck [ehem] make a cute face and look and me while we are chatting.

The cute face

In the middle of hanging out, one of our friends, Penelope [If you watch GG] recommended a dress to me but I reluctant to buy it because I don't really like it. Then she says I am picky and suddenly out of nowhere I burst and start screaming to her

"IT'S MY LIFE AND MY MONEY WHY DO YOU BOTHER?"

and just stormed out of there. I have to walk through the spooky building, at the hole in the wall I say someone's eye and suddenly the wall opens up and there stand a creepy-looking man just stare at me and I started running. Suddenly I walk pass a school assembly [?] and there where I heard my alarm clock get up.

Before this, no matter how much I like the character [Sam Winchester], I never dream about him. I wonder why I keep dreaming about Chuck and is it normal? Is there any shrink here that can tell ma? hehe

T.I.M.E

All of this, with everything that has been happening I finally realize that there's no reason to be worked up about. People often say that everything happens for a reason and now I might see the beginning of it. Every person that hurt me for the past few weeks, each of them I love very much which is the reason that every small action they do or every little things that they say might give enormous effect in my life as much as I'm trying to deny it.

Thanks to Juliet Sharp in Gossip Girl, I learn that revenge is a dessert best served cold. In other point of view, it is not wise to enjoy too much dessert since it is usually full of sugar and that is not good for your body. Eventually you will feel exhausted. Besides that, forgiving others actually affect our heart, it has nothing to do with theirs. We will feel the zen once we forgive others, try it.

Don't we miss the feeling of peace and free? I know I do. And for the first time yesterday, I actually have fun. It was amazing with you, but all this time I always wonder, will it stay like that forever? When I feel happy, I wonder am I dreaming to be this happy? And why?

Until now I have no answers to that. But if I am dreaming, I want to open my eyes now. We can't run from the reality forever. At one point, we have to wake up and face the music. We have to have "the talk". So if you care enough to have "the talk" with me, just tell me. But if you still want to be a coward and avoid the talk, maybe it's not meant to be.

I leave it all to Allah. He knows the best.

p/s: For you, S who just chatted with me yesterday, thanks you for being a loyal reader to my blog, you really didn't know how much it mean to me. I really appreciate it.

Chuck Bass

Hello Upper East Siders, upss, hello lovely readers how is it going? As some of you may know currently I have something called "celebrity crush" on one of the Gossip Girl's character, Chuck Bass played by Ed Westwick. I'm in love with the idea of Chuck Bass because he's a bad boy [which I usually route in movies or series that I watch or watched] and from where I am watching standing right now he is in a committed relationship with the most annoying yet adorable character in this show, Blair Waldorf. I love the way he handles Blair. He is the type of person who is willing to do anything, and I mean anything for the person he loves.

Tell me, how can't you fall in love with him?

Well, last night, I kinda have a dream about him. He confesses that he's attracted to me and he want to be my boyfriend. We texted but its really awkward for me because I don't know what to call him, but he's really sweet planning dinner for just the two of us. Unfortunately the private dinner doesn't turn to be private as we imagine it. Many people tag along so we ditch them and meet outside of the restaurant with bag packs [Its a dream, just go with it]. I saw him but he doesn't see me. Then I try to search for him but he's gone.

Then my alarm clock woke me up.

Well there goes my unsuccessful dream love story. I might watch too many Gossip Girl so its affecting my subconscious subconsciously. I'm hoping to see him again tonight [wink wink]. Funny thing about dreams, sometimes we didn't realize we care too much or too less about someone until we have a dream about them. We chase the dream when the reality is not that wonderful for us. But careful fellas, don't let the dream affecting your reality. However, you can make the dream as an inspiration, but not more than that.

Let me put the ending of this post Gossip Girl style.

You know you love me,

XOXO

Gossip Girl

Ipad Baru

Iman [anak sepupu kami] sedang membelek-belek IPad Mini Mayah. Selepas itu ayahnya, Abg Herman [sepupu kami] datang kepada kami, lalu Iman menunjukkan Ipad Mini Mayah kepada Abg Herman.

"Bak, ni IPad Mini",

Abg Herman pon memandang kearah Ipad Mini tersebut, lalu berfikir seketika. Kemudian dia bersuara;

"Bak takde Ipad Mini. Nak tahu apa bak ada? Ipad Bini!",

Lalu kami pun, iya, anda tahu yang selanjutnya.

Luscious cookies

Tell me fellas, what is more luscious than a freshly batch of cookies hot from the oven? The vanilla smell spread all over the house. Melted chocolate chip touches your taste buds, excites it. The way the cookie crumbles, crunchy, with some tasteful variety of nuts. The satisfaction it gave you when all of it comes together; the cookies, the chocolate chip, the nuts, the warmness, the vanilla smell.

Ever experience more? I'm sure you have. Baking is one of my passion. And cookies seems to be the bake goods that I make the most, although it is not a piece of cake. Oh see what I did there?

One thing about the stuff you like; you'll do it even though how exhausted you'll be. Thats why we call it passion. Want to hear a cute love story?

Once upon a time, there live a regular guy and there's his beloved bubbly girl. The guy loves to play a sport which I call, the p sport. One day the guy enters a p tournament and the girl went to the guy to give him her moral support even though she's pretty much alone when the guy is playing. The girl didn't mind being alone as long as she can see her guy plays. When the guy is resting he approaches the girl and ask her
"Aren't you bored?",
The girl answers
"Emmm, I don't know. Probably not!",
And there she stayed until the end of the tournament. The truth is, that guy is her passion and how can she get bored when she's watching things that she loves.

Ok the story might be not that cute, but, still, throw me a bone here! Oh I just chatted with one of my best friend, another shocking news came out. I pray for the best of it, I really really hope the people involved could think wisely before jumping into any not-so-wise decision. Think about the ripple effect of your action instead of only thinking about yourself.

Since I am really exhausted from all the baking, I have to pen off now. Tomorrows gonna be a long day and not-so-long trip to the North. I hope the traffic is not that bad.

Have a great weekend fellas. Happy holidays too!

Juicy

Assalamualaikum and hello hello there. Here I am back from some pecel lele and feeling-pouring session with one of my dearest friend. And guess what fellas, there's a surprising news received just now. Is this the year of surprises or what?
Of course due to the secrecy code, the one who listens can't reveal the secret, thus sorry you guys, no gossip for today. I can give you this though, its really juicy and mind twisting. I hope to see a happy ending for that.
Oh wait, one of my classmates is getting engaged this weekend. Oh how time flies. I pray that she's happy. They'll be happy. Insyaallah.
Back to the sewing activity that took place today, it gives me a headache. I found out one thing; my sewing is getting neater than before. Maybe I need a good afternoon nap for the rest of my days to avoid this kind of headache.
So fellas, how was your day?

Closure

It just in: Twitter has it that the most controversial thesis of the year has been submitted to my supervisor today [or yesterday?], lets just put it as; it has been submitted 4th of February 2013. After about 3 hours of waiting today and about three hours for about 3 days of waiting, I finally managed to meet my busy bee supervisor to submit my thesis.
He's been the most wonderful person that helps me a lot through this semester, looking out for me, he even present when I'm presenting my technical paper and actually smile when I'm presenting. Its just the sweetest.
As it implied; as soon as I've submitted my thesis, my undergraduate life has ended, putting my unemployment life to a fresh start. There are tons to do before I actually [want to] get started to the job-seeking life. As mentioned in earlier post, this morning I have the whole "spring cleaning" stuff after submitting my dissertation. A bunch of clothes that needs fixing here and there were discovered. As tomorrow's morning sun shining, just call me Cooleustary the tailor. It might be a lot easier if the sewing machine didn't broke down but, come on, it'll be over soon.
Gotta warm up the needles and threads ladies and gentlemen cause tomorrow we got a lot of sewing to do. Sew sew sew.

The battle

The new drawer has arrived. I have to re-sort my clothes so that it can fit into my drawers. My mom reserves space for my clothes in my brother's room but I think its the best that all of my clothing, or the ones that I actually wear stays in my room. Funny thing about changes, sometimes we thought that things will stay that way forever. You probably already know this but, IT DOESN'T. Drawers breaks, pets die, and people changes.

So I have a pretty dreadful cough for about two weeks now I think. Usually I'm not the type of person who take their drugs right away when they're sick. Not the type that won't eat or drink anything icy when they have a cough. But right now, I'm pretty cautious, which indicates that the cough is kinda bad. Enough on that topic.

It's gonna be a long day tomorrow. Cleaning up my room. More to spring cleaning. Getting rid of useless stuff. Making space for stuff that matters. Hey have you heard that if we didn't use something for about two years, we won't use it ever again? Come to think of it, I have like tons of stuffs that I didn't use for years, but hard to let go. Its all memory you know. All the letters from your friends at high school, the handmade birthday cards, the apology card [yeah I kinda like to sulk back then], stuff like that you always wondered, is it worth to provide some space for it or should you just let it go and lock the memory safe in your mind?

Its a pretty true statement that you won't use that stuff again. So why keep it? But for the sake of memories, wouldn't it be better keeping that stuff and reminisce the old times? That is the battle that took take place at almost every spring cleaning I do. A battle between mind and heart. Reserving spaces for memories vs using the space for things that matters. Practicality vs memories. Going back to your past is not a great idea, but once in a while you might need to glance at it so that you can see the great things that keep you going. It is utterly vital though that you don't let the past hold you back.

So people who read this [if only] please help me with this duality. Which one is your choice, memory or practicality?